Wednesday, July 10, 2013

The Broken Tail Light - My Testimony

There are precious stories to learn from. These stories were written a very long time ago. Their messages are as relevant today as it was back then. How do I know this? As I listened to these stories on an audio bible called the Word of PROMISE, I was listening to my life.

Yes, I do know how to read, but I listened to all 79 CDs of these wonderful stories. I listen to them not just once, but over and over again. I listen to the word on CDs 4 times each in four weeks to be exact. There is not enough light to read a book by when you are homeless living in a mini-van going from parking lot to parking lot.

Thank GOD!

If you have a problem with a piece of software, you place a call to the help desk. You want to get a skilled and knowledgeable person on the other end of the phone. You want the level 3 Tech. Guess where the level 3 Tech gets his knowledge from: the programing developer and The Driver Gods. The Driver Gods are the unsung under paid heroes or so called miracle workers of any software solution. Why, these skilled artisans make software work on hardware. Their title is an industry term.

All these types of geeks are mostly kept in cubicles and not allowed out in public very much. These are people that you really would not have at the top of your guest list for a dinner party. However, if you are going into a sales battle to the death with competition, these three types are the ones that you want on the side. Software never makes it to market successfully unless the demonstration to a customer is void of Murphy’s Law.  God bless the consumers in the world. They have kept us producing at our best because of the put the key in and the engine starts mentality.

People just don’t realize the orchestra of artisans at work just for the key of a simple piece of software to start the engine or boot up. We just take that for granted these days. Thanks to the consumer! If not, industry would not have to be on their toes. If a product does not work, it can generate a sale. However, if a product does not work, it will not generate a reorder. It will die.

You can have a better than sliced bread solution, one that will revolutionize the world, but if it does not talk or work with a completely different animal called hardware, you have nothing! Oh what a not so wonderful world it would be if it was not for the customer expectations. Thank GOD for the consumer’s patience when an honest human mistake (a bug) is accepted as long as it gets corrected.

The demonstration or demo is where you finish the race and beat the competitors. The reward is a closed sale. A sale can be achieved by a fake performance. A sale, that proves and exceeds the customers’ expectations, now that is a SALE. This type leads to relationship building, respect, and reorders. Ever see a movie with the statement in it that goes something like: I am bona fide.

Try reading a story by James the Apostle about WORKS. There is a test at the end!

There are many dog and pony shows preformed as demos just to close a sale. These are ruled by meeting projected numbers, quotas, and commissions. Hopefully a term called Customer Service tries to weed out these deceitful sales practices or techniques. A story, or a letter, comes to mind here: Titus:11-13.

Sell the customer something they want and it will actually be beneficial for them. I make no apology for being in sales or being a salesman. If it were not for sales, things in this world would not come to fruition. The light bulb created by Mr. Edison would still be in a lab in New Jersey, if he did not get out and sell it to the world. Plus it worked and he got a reorder. Oh Boy did he get reorders!

Wow, there is a concept. Wow, sales with a conscience behind the motive, now there is something to think about. The customers are just going to love that. Treat people the way you want to be treated. Where did I read that before James 2:8? That sounds so wonderful.

How do you sell that? How do you get a Sales Manager to accept that concept when Monday meetings or beatings are ruled by exceeding projected numbers and quotas?

Wait; there is a rule in the worldly life or company persona that goes something like this: you never talk religion or politics at any gathering. So the concept of treating others as spelled out the way it supposed to be gets tabled.

That lost concept now becomes an internal battle. That internal battle stays within a salesperson even when they go home from work into the environment of family. All I can say here is Ding Ding. I will explain that in a little bit.

This is where a battle brews inside a salesperson with integrity and a conscience. This conflict is where a smoldering ember starts inside a salesperson with conscientious characteristics. A worldly up bringing taught this man; to be a man, suck it up. Keep that kind of stuff to yourself. Add an addictive personality on top of that conflict and then you have the gasoline to throw on that ember. 1 Peter 4:3-4

The word wildfire comes to mind. Do not get the impression that I am about to blame or not take responsibility for my actions. Oh what an easy thing to do blame my upbringing for all my mistakes. To blame everything on someone else that way I can keep my good name and reputation. Wow, if I did that all I would get is just a slap on the hand for my indiscretions. Wow, I could actually live with the conflict inside me and live with my defective self. 

There are a few things in the business world that are difficult; making a sale to a salesman and hiding a problem that is not being corrected. Sales can cure a lot of evils is an expression that is over used to cover up problems.

I have had upper management and board of directors makes choices like: we know our superstar has personal issues, but he does make us millions of millions of dollars. We cannot afford to lose that kind of revenue stream, but how do we put a positive spin on his personal issues? Let’s get him help. That provides corporate responsibility with an out.  This gives our company a palatable explanation for turning the other cheek on a personnel violation. Do it!

Oh Boy, give an addictive personality that fish bowl to swim in and you get a hall pass straight to an implosion. The fish bowl grows larger and larger. Historical events have happened under those terms. One comes to mind: Ding Ding Iceberg dead a head.

I have no one to blame except myself. I do have a ghost that I have been trying to follow. No, I am not trying to blame my faults on a ghost. I will blame my drive to succeed on that ghost. If I am successful in the business world then I am following in my late Dad’s footsteps; James D. Mahoney Sr.

You can learn about him in a book titled “The Monsanto story, Faith, Hope, and $5,000.” I will say that the title of that book sounds familiar doesn’t it? No he was not in charge of the Agent Orange failure. I bring the topic of my late Dad up here to share two statements that he made all the time. “I am the captain of the ship and the master of my soul and one about a rendezvous with destiny.”  My late Dad was very smart, but didn’t write either one of those statements. He made you think he did though.

Those are statements that filed my flight plan for Destination Disaster.

There are a few other statements that I have heard in my life that I wish I had not. Statements made by successful business people. Accepting these statements as a how to succeed in business without really trying (I am not knocking an old movie here) shows how weak and vulnerable my soul was to outside influence. One comes to mind: “Play as hard as you work”. That came from a weekend visit to a personal island retreat and mansion owned by and said by the majority shareholder for PepsiCo. in 1000 Islands, New York.

Well guess what way my mind and heart heard it: Let the party begin and never end. Big Mistake! I wished I could tell you that I didn’t use a book about the top partying schools in the US to make the decision on what college to pick. I can’t.

I believe these people had no harm when their tongues made these statements. The Bible tells us that what comes out of the tongue counts as a NO NO big-time. Outside influences are much better at sales than I am. However, those outside influences lose. GO GOD!

No I am not going to give you a play by play of a personal tailspin. I repented to the BIG GUY on those and don’t need to do a 12 step program for you the reader. I did it for the ones I have hurt and got tuff love slapped in my face. That hurts to the bone, trust me on that. Been there done that, but because of the worldly. There is a sign on a highway near Macon that says: Only GOD allows U-turns. There should be one other that says: The worldly will label you. The worldly will not forget. The worldly will not forgive. The worldly will keep you down.

How many fully loaded Boeing 747 Fire Tankers does it take to put out a wildfire? There are people in Texas that I met; who swear they have mosquitoes the size of 747s. I can tell you the reader here that a 747 is not even the size of a gnat (NO SEE’Ms with teeth for those in South Carolina), compared to the ONE who put out my wildfire. GOD!

Oh does anyone know who created nature? No it was not Darwin. Does anyone know that a wildfire is actually a natural way of cleansing? Cleansing, is that the concept that could get my life back from disaster? If that helps, that could sell. I wonder who thought that up (Hebrews 9:14). Duh!

No one knows a program better than the guy that has to make it work. No one knows how a program works in the real world better than a level 3 Tech, but the level 3 Tech does not make it in sales. They just know how to make the program work and get it to bend to fit a customer’s needs.

Well guess what; I am not just a salesman. I am a hybrid. I have the skilled talents of all three of those special geeks. That talent is in the body and soul of a conscientious salesman. Wrap that up in the best merchant training (when Macy’s was Macy’s, because of Nordstrom’s and Lord & Taylor, based on customer service) anyone could get and you have John Mahoney. Merchant turned Retail GEEK. That makes me a quite formidable competitor in the sales arena. What better asset for a software company to have in the POS or Point of Sale Software Solution Industry.

I am going to go so far as saying; there is no better expert on those 51 years of data called my life than I. Sounds like I know a thing or two about sales and the software business too. Wall Street even uses me for advice on investing in software and hardware companies. I bet those companies would have second thoughts when my resume gets thrown in the trash can so quickly. Everyone knows how hard it is to sell a salesman. I sold myself from those few statements.

I am the golden boy from Macy’s South for God’s sakes. I have lived under a bridge in Savannah, Georgia and pulled myself up to be in some of the finest suites at the Waldorf Astoria. I have been on a Gulfstream jet flying to a meeting with the President of the United States. Yes I did, but it was Nixon meeting with my late Dad not me. Everyone knows how hard it is to sell a salesman. I sold myself from those few statements that I heard in my life. They became my battle cry and driving force to succeed in the business world.
 That is my life story and I am sticking to it. Why? I am the master of my soul.

Who knew that the words in those statements were going to lead to my demise? GOD knew! Titus: 11-13 was written about me and to everyone that has come to know me.

OK, bring it home John; Yes Sir! But… I can’t. I can’t drive anymore!
GOD; I have a broken tail light!

I have been lying all along to myself and to others. My life has escalated and deteriorated at the same time. I am cooked, put a fork in me, I am done!  Forgive me GOD. Please forgive me I have been serving two Masters and fooling myself and you! (Matthew 6:24)

I never knew how cold it could be lying here in the back of a mini-van in Macon during the middle of December. I was lying in the back of a mini-van that had expired tags from Texas. No driver’s license. It had been taken for being expired. The only valid copy was in a storage unit that had double locks on it for lack of payment. I had pawned my computers to buy food and protect them from being stolen by the family of low lives that saw me as a Thanksgiving Turkey. Only good to carve up and fleece for every dime they could.
All I have left is my loving dog with me.

I surely can’t take care of myself, but my dog.  She has done nothing and I have no means left to provide for her.

Oh GOD please, please I have failed you and don’t deserve your grace or help. Let me drown for my UN holy mistakes, but please Oh GOD, please hear me. Take care of me dog. She has done nothing but to love me. She has loved me all along when I don’t even love myself anymore. I am such a wretch and not worthy, but Daisy. Oh GOD, but Daisy…

I just realized that I just typed the very last words that my late Dad said back on September 11th. oh so long ago: “take care of me dog”. I said his very words and just now noticed it! GO GOD.
Calvin Jackson to John (1 year ago)
Wouldn’t it be nice if all of God’s children could display Jesus the way you are doing it. It helps to know the power of DUH……….i am sure Jesus has told you he is pleased with your progress…….don’t let your guard down….c

Guess what John, it is MY story not yours!

OK, who is in this van? Daisy, when did you start snoring in English? Look I am not trying to get free room and board here in a rubber room. Our language has some limitations to it. I can’t describe how HIS message is communicated to a person. I am not seeing burning bushes, bellowing voices coming from the clouds, etc. It is spiritual. I can’t explain it.

I don’t have to explain it, but please seek this relationship out for your-self. You have nothing to lose, but…
I want to share with you the scariest thing a person can do, surrender. Without doing this, GOD’s door does not open. Did I know this, maybe? Did I ever hear it, yes. Did it ever sink in, nope! Do I know it now; you better believe it!

To prove it to me, HA! GOD does not have to prove. I have come to believe that HE is from Missouri. HE works, if you work with and for HIM. (Matthew 7:7)

GOD had another one of HIS wonderful stories cross my path that morning. You never know whom you are going to meet in life? A lovely young Lady on an evangelistic quest (inspired by a love for GOD and the TV shows from the Great Awakening out of Tampa, FL.) full of fire stopped me in a parking lot that Daisy and I were living in. She asked if I had accepted Jesus into my life as my Lord and Savior. My response was so empty and void of heart felt sincerity that I want to cry now. Oh, yes I have…I am Spirit of Macon. I about puked those words out of my mouth.

Spirit of Macon, those words went through my mind like a flash back from a trippy Grateful Dead concert years ago in New Orleans. So many thoughts were racing in my head at once. They were all over the place. There were so many visions and comments flashing all at once. I was dizzy. I about fell out right there in the parking lot. The shakedown cruise to the North East was a disaster. I learned that if you do something for GOD that is not sanctioned by GOD you are doing it for yourself. You are actually doing and telling HIM how to do HIS job. That dog does not hunt! I know that firsthand and should have known that about my first 51 years. All About Me, NOT ABOUT HIM. That just does not work.

I about collapsed in that parking lot, but the lovely young Lady on an evangelistic quest said later that I looked and acted fine.

I remembered Ray, three days earlier, saying when I drove up to his home to do laundry before an interview; I thought you were the President of a company in Texas? You are not doing that car thing still, are you? What has happened to you? Why don’t you go ask Calvin if you can live in his basement again? This was a good one, but not from Ray; you’re doing laundry to get a job at a truck stop to clean bathrooms? What has happened to you? Ray’s wife said a prayer for me to find GOD again.

I never had my head hanging as low as I did when I went out to the van in his driveway. Wait yes I did.
Oh no, not this pain again. Please for the love of GOD not this, but there it was in living color. I had to relive the absolute worst thing in my life and it was on a 100 inch flat screen TV in my head. I was on a historic binge when my Blessed Mother died. I never got to say goodbye to her. I lied about that one too, but this time it was not swept under the doormat. I was caught red handed with no way to slither out of the truth. Ding Ding iceberg dead ahead, nope not an iceberg, but a fiery lake.

In the US Navy there is an expression that goes like “Your turn in the pickle barrel”. I was in GOD’s pickle barrel. There is fermenting and healing going on in that barrel. Sometimes you can be your own worst enemy. This experience is no different. What about my GOD given talents. I thought or said out loud. Word of advice here, don’t say or think stuff like that when you are trying to defend yourself with the ALL MIGHTY. This is not a very wise thing to do with the creator of Wisdom. Let the schooling begin. Have you ever been in front of a judge and you think you have effectively argued your case in your favor? I have. Then the judge asks in such a manner that you know you have won your case.  Then the question; “and what do you do for a living sir?” My answer; “I am a commission salesman.” BAM goes the gavel. Guilty is proclaimed. But, I thought, but, those are my god given talents, I said pathetically.  “I gave you those talents mister. Those are my talents and you have not used them for my glory.” My head, ego, and soul dropped. My chin dropped down at that point. I had no answer!

Our GOD is a loving GOD. Ever heard that expression? It is true. It is all so true. GOD’s loving finger was placed on my sinking chin and HE lifted it up! My time in the GOD’s pickle barrel was the best thing that could ever have happened to me.

I stated that I was serving Two Masters. I hope that confession was not taken in anyway close to an understatement. I could have run for and been re-elected by a land slide as the mayor of Sodom or Gomorrah. If there had been a legal rap sheet on me, Robert Downey Jr. would have looked like an Eagle Scout.

Wow, I had not even thought of Spirit of Macon. I had just pawned my last computer for what; to keep some blood suckers and lust of the flesh from getting it. That was the computer with all the files, pictures, and stories from Spirit of Macon on it. I pawned GOD’s story. Oh, do I suck!

I was given the greatest gift ever by being part of that journey of the Spirit of Macon. Oh GOD all those prayers, all those wonders that I witnessed, what have I done. Oh the hood is in a storage unit that I can’t pay for. I am going to lose GOD’s hood. Oh boy, do I SUCK BIG TIME!

I do not have the ability to let you know and feel what surrender is. I cannot in words come close to describing what it feels like. What that moment truly feels like. We have built into us a survival instinct for self-perversion. I was at the top of the World Trade Center and put my face up against the window and looked down. I have a fear of heights and tall buildings. I do not know if anyone can relate to what I felt at that moment. Take that feeling and put it together with being in the Path Train area of the World Trade Center on the day the first attack happened. I was there coming back from a sales presentation at Bamberger’s. Those two feelings combined are the equivalent of a stubbing your toe compared to surrendering.

There is a wonderful scene in a Warner Brothers classic called The Spirit of St. Louis. Charles ‘Slim’ Lindbergh played by James Stewart is making the landing at LeBourget Airport in Paris, France. The lights are in his face. He cannot see where to land the airplane. Fatigue from the transatlantic flight and lack of sleep have won over his ability to fight them off. The airplane is committed to land. It is too low to safely go around. There is no more gas to sustain flight. He is going to crash and die. It is all over. Mr. Steward as Mr. Charles Lindbergh gives up. He lets go of the controls. He says a prayer for GOD to take over and land the plane. There is silence. There is ominous music. That is very close to experiencing surrender. James Steward must have done this act in real life, because that is it.

Getting GOD to know who you are is easy. Getting back into GOD’s good graces is not easy. As a matter of fact, it is work for every second, every minute, every hour, and every day for the rest of your life. I mentioned Surrender is a scary thing to do having been brought up in the worldly. This might be a good time to bring up something that might not be very palatable. Kind a like Castor Oil, but if it were not for this topic, I would not be typing GOD’s story here.

There is an old southern term for an act of discipline. Thanks to the political correctness and our lawyers (Vickers in the UK) this is not done anymore. However, GOD took me behind the wood shed! He has taken me on an open heart autopsy of my soul and spirit. Thank GOD I died! (Psalms 62:1)

In the software solution industry a sales is not closed even after the check clears. You can still lose it even after there is a commitment. So too is the commitment of being saved and accepting Jesus. I am the one with Spirit of Macon, HA. I blew it. I lost HIM! However, HE found me again. Thank GOD!

Remember I am homeless, but not lost. I thought. It can’t get any worse or can it. Ding-A-ling the cell phone rings. When that phone call finished from my pastor, well now I am Churchless.

I was given the meaning of 3rd John out of context to rebuttal being Churchless and to defend against society’s reactions to my homeless, worthless predicament. Nothing was sinking in at this point, because it is difficult to listen when you are trying to get off the pot. The Pity Pot.

If you are ever taken behind the wood shed. There is usually an explanatory speech given before what is to come. That speech was the verse from 3rd John. Know it? I didn’t. There is going to be a test on this at the end. Cliff notes don’t work on this test. The subject matter is the New Testament. Trust me on this one, wait don’t trust me. Trust GOD.

Third John is a great story with lessons to be learned. If I ever get a dinner table again, I am going to make sure to invite certain guests to it. The list would include Jesus and a level 3 Tech; not Diotrephes.

Come on now I didn’t put you the reader through all that geek, sales, and my life stuff up in the beginning of this story for nothing. I didn’t brag about all the things I had or the fancy places I have been. Buckle up Mr. and Mrs. Jones. All that time I thought I had to keep up with you all. All that time living under the false worldly saying that he who dies with the most toys, wins.

Anyone remember the Denver Broncos vs. the San Francisco 49ers in the Super Bowl held at the Super Dome. Denver got the ball first and just went through San Fran like a hot knife going through butter. How do I know this? I was there as a guest of NFL Properties. Looks like David is going to repeat against the giant. Until… Do not get me wrong, I am not saying that Joe Montana is GOD or the son of GOD. My late Mother would beg to differ on this point, but. She was a Notre Dame Fan to the end.

Knowledge cannot win over the Author of Truth and Wisdom.

Well, I got to relive my life behind the wood shed with the Author of My Life: GOD. Know what, besides he knew it much better than this Denver FAN. GOD knew my lies. He knew that I had lied to myself. Oh GOD knows everything.

I did what I thought was a job for GOD. Big Big Mistake and GOD let me have it with both barrels right between my soul and my heart. The first shakedown cruise for Spirit of Macon was not for GOD’s glory, it was for my prideful self. I wanted GOD to save me from my situation and not myself. Who was I to think that I could change hearts and repair The Mahoney family? Do not try this at home; do not try this in life here on earth. It does not work; it will not work and it will only lead to a deadly crash.

I failed. I don’t care how much knowledge one can have on a subject, you can’t win a debate with the Author of the book. No not this book; HIS book. THE BIBLE. I was such a fool for my first 51 years. Well let’s review my situation; homeless, unemployed, penny less, and just had my life and soul handed to me on the silver platter of it sucks. No one would buy that product in the market place. There may or may not even be a sale, definitely no reorders given.

The worldly would say it is OK and justify the pity pot and a scarlet letter of Woe Is Me on my sweater? Then they would judge. Let us get him out of our sights and send him to get help. That is what their good conscience and moral up bringing tells them to do. Most certainly no one would understand why he allowed this to happen to himself. We would never let that happen to ourselves. My GOD, look at all he had. This man had it all. (Luke 15:11-32)

Remember I mentioned before about surrender being a scary and painful thing. Well, I am right and wrong at the same time. Wait, you have got to be kidding the reader here, you had it all. I HAD IT ALL WRONG, BIGTIME!

There are people out in the real world that will not get stopped in their tracks by my next comment. Those people know what the expression and the correct meaning for just one simple word. That word is beloved.
Yes, I had it all; I had it all WRONG! I had to let the old John die to come to hold that definition close to my new heart, soul, and awakened spirit. There it is. That “IT” we are trying to find the meaning of. There it is right on this page. Right there in front of us. “I had it all wrong”. 51 years it took and my life. Oh, I am not dead, just born again. Thank you Jesus: for dying for me so that I could live.
Just words you may say? HA

When I left on the journey of Spirit of Macon, I asked what happens when I am on the verge of running out of gas; just wait on GOD was the response. Think I knew what that meant, nope!

I do now! Maybe you should too. Maybe that is why he has had me type this book while He dictates it to me. “Just go and show what GOD has done in your life” I did not say that, it was told to me. I was brought to my knees by my lies. I was brought to my knees by me. I had to be in order to give up. I had to let old John die to get out of GODs way to begin and develop the story of HIS John Mahoney.

I was on the floor of a van. I was called out on the carpet. I was broken. I was destitute. I did not even like myself let alone love myself. I was not going to kill myself or anything like that. I did not have to. I was already dead. Except for who was going to take care of Daisy? That poor little girl!

If there are pet lovers reading this and think you know what I am about to type next. Think again. You can be coming home after the worst day ever and there is your faithful friend with those loving eyes waiting on you. Wow, is that ever the best. Right there waiting patiently for you and has nothing but love for you. Do you know who that is? It is GOD. Yes Daisy, you are such a good girl as she gets a loving pet from me, but GOD is so GOOD. HE picked me up.

HE had been waiting for me to come home after a 51 years of bad days. HE waited for me so he could fix me. Daisy is good, but not that GOOD. I am free now. Praise you GOD for not giving up on me.
Let me put it into accounting terms for those business people from Missouri out there. Everyone who ever had to take Accounting 101 has to remember Debits to the left and Credits to the right. Take a minute to look at a checkbook register. I know you all still have checks, because of the number of check reading printers I have sold to supermarkets and convenience stores. In simple terms, all the items on the left side are supposed to add up to all the items on the right side. Hence the phrase Balance Sheet is born.

Let us look at mine for a minute. On the left hand side goes all the pity pot stuff. Follow me on this. On the right side I am going to put down my Blessings. With this fancy Dell and Microsoft Excel I am going to do the math. Guess what I can’t do it. It will not balance. The Blessings are far greater than the losses. Well then, that is not a balance sheet at all, it is turning into a profit and lost statement that is in the black, not the red.

Why, because of Spirit of Macon. No that was just a car. Spirit of Macon is why I am not on the pity pot and the woe is me whining team. I am going to rename this report for clarification. I am going name it Spirit of GOD’s children. Spirit of GOD’s children in Macon, no let me call it as I feel it; Spirit of GOD’s children in the world around us.

STOP, you have made me read this so far and now John Mahoney, you are going to turn this book into an acceptance speech given at a beauty contest? You John Mahoney are just and will always be a salesman, a good for nothing salesman who has lost your ever love’n homeless, unemployed, dumb donkey mind! How about it is pee in a cup time user!

If this thought has crossed your mind at all, stop and it is GOD’s TIME. Remember GOD does not have to prove a thing to anyone. Or did he already. I mean, I should be dead or locked up somewhere so that this story could not be shared. Why am I still alive? Why am I living in the back of a van with this computer writing a story for GOD? Why aren’t I in a homeless shelter getting a society healing method of help? The Spirit cannot help you, only a State run program can. Programs have to glorify themselves to get funded. Sounds like forecasting numbers in a Monday sales meeting. Don’t take my word for it, let a few of GOD’s children on a small point on a map called Macon, Georgia and their Christian actions be a picture that is worth a 1,000 words. Let’s find what John Mahoney is counting as Blessings.

Oh there are a few from the past that I know now GOD had a hand in on that list. Do GOD’s children around the USA count their blessings? Proof is in the pictures of prayers written on a car. A car named Spirit of Macon.
•             I am alive in order to go and show people what God has done in my life with HIS new life in me.
•             I wrote and completed a book FOR GOD under a diversity of circumstances. Oh LORD thank you for a chair on this all-nighter.
•             GOD healed me from major cancer, twice.
•             I had a heavenly out of body transportation in front of people. There is no such thing as time!
•             I had people tell me, I want what he’s got in the last few weeks of this transformation. Not there goes a homeless person, hide.
•             I have GOD in my life.
•             A former gang member paid to get this Dell computer and GOD’s story out of a pawn shop and it has given him a professional company web site image to be fruitful in life. His heart was touched by GOD.
•             That former gang member was stopped by GOD from doing bodily harm to me in front of the local Library.
•             GOD’s Dell was the tool that got my resume completed.
•             My resume has hit 3 companies with sales positions open having salaries over $100,000 each. I have turned them down. (Get to that one at the end)
•             A former addict gave me cash to check into a motel room with internet to get a publisher for GOD’s story.
•             I got freedom from serving two masters. HE took that one away and its temptations are powerless. 
Why, because GOD waited for me to let the old “I” die and not help out the other team to win over my freewill and gain my silence to share GOD’s Story of this John.
Let us keep looking at what HIS John learned to count as blessings.
•             A local church allowed me to decorate their Christmas tree. GOD let me feel my Mom while I was hanging an angle.
•             How do I know, her favorite song was “Silver Bells”. Two silver bells fell at my feet.
•             A Child of GOD found me in a parking lot in Macon, GA. and helped GOD save me again. GOD granted my needs; He gave me a few days in a motel room with Internet was delivered without asking for it.
•             I died to get saved to tell HIS story. (Read the Bible to understand that one)
•             I got back relationships that were once lost. Thank you GOD for the chair and this basement!
•             I got back confidence.
•             I don’t have to live with lies anymore.
•             The old “I” died. That is a great one. Read the Bible to find out why is so great.
•             I don’t have guilt or longing over the loss of my Mother. Instead, I have honor for having known her.
•             I have love again. I like and love myself again. Wow, is that a big one.
•             I am greedy, I want more of GOD.
•             I miss my mother’s BBQ shrimp. My bad, wrong list…
•             GOD let me find my mother’s recipe for BBQ shrimp in the storage unit.
•             The owner of the storage unit let me get a small space heater out of a unit in the rears because, she notice a change for the better in me.
•             That small church with a big heart in Macon, GA. actually saved GOD’s Hood and they did not even know it.
•             Daisy and I did not freeze to death.
•             I have no wants. All my needs are taken care of.
•             I was not killed when two oozes were pointed at my head.
•             I didn’t die during the first attack on the WTC.
•             I missed Flight 5050 in NYC
•             GOD’s dog Daisy is fine and well. Oh, she is trying to out good the one who invented GOOD.
•             I know now how to listen for the right voice and not the wrong one.          
     Want to know why this has been the greatest time in my life.

DUH!

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